The Ticket Money in April

Throughout winter, Lena saved a little from each temporary job for a concert in April. She kept the money separate and checked the ticket release date often. The concert was not necessary, which somehow made choosing it feel more personal.

Then a three day job was cancelled. Lena had expected that payment to cover part of the following month's everyday expenses. She sat with her calendar and considered using the concert money instead. She disliked the idea immediately, then disliked herself for caring so much about one evening of music.

Her friend offered sympathy rather than a solution. 'You can be disappointed even if nobody has done anything wrong,' she said. Lena checked the dates again and decided not to buy a ticket when sales opened. She needed the money for ordinary costs, and pretending otherwise would not make the concert enjoyable.

April arrived with more work, but the concert had sold out. Lena did not invent a cheerful lesson about missing it. She played the band's music while cooking and admitted that she wished she had been there.

After dinner, she labelled a new page in her notebook 'Things I Still Want'. The concert went at the top. Moving the money had changed her plan, not removed her right to want something beyond the next bill.